80. Did I just swerve an identity crisis??
What Theseus' ship has to do with your professional identity
In my teens and early 20s, it felt like I was asked to introduce myself a lot.
In classrooms, on sports teams, at job interviews, networking events, meeting new friends… All called for introductions. And a ‘fun fact’ I used a lot, something thing that made 'unique’ was that I had been homeschooled for most of my life.
For someone talking with this bubbly, sometimes overly chatty young woman, finding out I had only attended one year of school before University always got a reaction, and provided context to who I was.
But at some point in my 20s, I hit a point when sharing this ‘fun fact’ just didn’t feel relevant anymore. I was getting too old to use a fact about my childhood as personal background for my professional career, so I stopped mentioning it.
Poof. Gone.
Still a true fact about me. Still something that shaped who I am and how I relate to the world. But no longer something I would share. No longer a good self descriptor in most situations.
Theseus’ Ship: A Paradox of Identity
In Greek mythology, Theseus slayed the minotaur, rescued the children of Athens and escaped on his ship. Each year, the Athenians would commemorate him by taking his ship on a pilgrimage to the city of Delos.
The Athenians replaced the decaying boards of the ship over time, and eventually the entire ship was made up of new planks, causing ancient philosophers to ask a question that became a philosophical paradox:
If every piece of the ship is replaced, is it still the same ship? If not, at what point did it cease to be the Ship of Theseus?
Almost a millenia later, the philosopher Thomas Hobbes asked a second question:
If a builder collected all the original planks and built a second ship. Now there are two ships: the one with the replaced parts and the one built with the original parts. Which, if either, is the true Ship of Theseus?
These questions are designed to make us ponder the idea of identity when parts change over time. With the discovery of cell regeneration in humans, this question becomes extra fascinating.
UNFORTUNATELY I’m not here to solve an ancient philosophical paradox (could you imagine??) but I do find the question of Theseus’ Ship an interesting precursor for the question of personal identity, and more specifically, identity crisis.
My Big Realization At 24
As I mentioned, in my early to mid 20s I realized that talking about homeschooling didn’t really make sense anymore for describing who I am, and that triggered some other fascinating realizations about my identity as I grew out of my ‘young adult’ years.
Back then, I had always been told I was ‘mature for my age’ and anytime I looked around a room of professionals, I was almost always the youngest person in it.
Probably because I was an oldest child. Or because I had started working very young. Or maybe because I have a late birthday, so even my peers were typically older.
But whatever it was, I grew up seeing myself as the young, overachieving professional. Speaking assuredly (I’ve always had delusional self confidence) with people far more impressive than myself, in rooms I had no right being in.
But as I hit age 24, and then definitely when I turned 25, I started noticing that this ‘role’ or ‘identity’ I had chosen for myself just didn’t fit quite as well anymore.
I started to see 20-year olds and realized I was no longer the youngest person at the table. People would still occasionally be surprised at my age, but not so much anymore — does this mean I’m JUST A REGULAR ADULT NOW??
Now, I know age is just a number (I feel that more and more every year) and at 24 I knew I was still quite young, but even so, I made a decision that has served me well in so many areas of my life since then.
I let go of that identity.
I mean, it wasn’t quite that simple. But it wasn’t as hard as everyone makes identity evolution sound either. At 24, I liked who I was and what I was doing. Whether people thought I was accomplishing a lot for my age or not.
So why hold so tightly to that identity?
Swerving The Professional Identity Crisis
My secret to letting go of this tired identity?
I stopped thinking of myself as the youngest person in the room.
I started offering advice to younger creatives/entrepreneurs.
I let go of some other ‘identity markers’ that didn’t really serve me anymore.
I talked to my friends about identity as we age and grow.
And honestly, I told everyone I was a few years older than I was. No one blinked, which helped me stop holding tight to an identity I didn’t really want anymore.
In the years since, I’ve seen what happens when people hold too tightly to identities, both positive and negative, like feeling “behind everyone else” or being a “people pleaser” or think you’re the “fun one” or even a specific job title.
Whatever words we use to describe ourselves that gives voice to who we think we are or who we want to be.
Holding too tight to these identities, especially in professional spaces, can make it really hard to evolve. Really hard to shift priorities when our lives change.
I see people struggle to evolve in their work when they move somewhere new, become parents, go through burnout, are grieving, want to pursue a new career, or want to become an entrepreneur.
And as much as changing and growing may be tricky, I think we make it much harder on ourselves because we’re often clinging to these identities like “perfectionist” or “CEO” or “the youngest one in the room” because we think THAT is who we are.
But just like Theseus’ ship, that part of yourself is just a plank.
Whenever you need to, you can let go of the tight grip you had on a specific ‘identity’ you were holding onto and replace it with a new plank on your ship. One that allows you to sail instead of sink.
🤠 What’s Cool…
Seeing results on long-term marketing tasks. I’ve been posting organically to my Pinterest account 1x per day Mon-Fri for 10 months and I’ve officially hit 12k views per month on average!
My simple posting strategy takes me about 2 minutes each morning, and maybe 30 minutes every two weeks to design a new batch of pins.
It’s been one of those ‘small, consistent steps” types of marketing and I’m finally starting to see regular traffic to my website directly from Pinterest - so fun to see progress like this even if it’s small.
I’ve heard that it just takes one or two pins to get really good traction to turn into a much larger, ongoing traffic source. So I’ll keep going and see what I can build over time on this unique search engine.
📚 Currently Reading…
Not reading any books this week, but I am reading some cool Substack pieces! I am especially loving Feeling! Magazine by Jenna O’Brien.
Her whole concept is so cool, with beautiful designs, cute recipes, heartwarming reflections on life, and thought pieces like her recent Substack: A Brief History of Hot Dog Cart Design in New York City.
🍊 Working On…
Here’s what’s going on at Belle White Creative HQ this week…
Getting ready for a week OOO: Lots of tasks on the list this week for some website design and copywriting projects before I take my first week off of the YEAR! Very excited to leave my inbox alone for a glorious week.
Doing Some Career Mentorship: I volunteered for a career mentorship session to help students in grades 8-12 learn more about potential career paths! I’m so excited to answer questions about working for yourself in creative businesses.
Playing Volleyball: We put together a recreational volleyball team for the Summer with some friends and it has been a BLAST so far! Love trying new things and getting outside in the evenings.
Thank you so much for being here and chat next Wednesday,
xo — Belle